I've had this song ("Maybe You're Right" by BNL) stuck in my head since Thursday morning.  And I can be that specific because I heard it on my MP3 player while driving to St. Paul Thursday morning.  So I listened to it four times in a row.  And then on the way home, it came up again, so I listened to it another three or four times in a row.  Because that's how I am when I find that one certain song that speaks to me at that moment in time: obsessive.   

My MP3 player has been awesome lately.  It seems like every other song makes me go, "Oooooh!  I love this song, and I haven't heard it forever!!"  DH was disgruntled at first because for the longest time I only had two artists on there (a-ha and BNL), so finally I downloaded our entire library on there, some 4000 songs or whatever (because we haven't bought as much music in the last ten years as we used to).  And so now he's happy, but you know what, I still only listen to either a-ha or BNL.  Oh, someday I will hopefully use the "random play ALL" feature, but for now, I'm too picky. 

ANYWAY.  I think I have that song uploaded here already.  Let me see . . .

And here are the lyrics:

It was often talked about, it was often raised
But nothing was ever done about it
To hear the way they talked about it, no one could be saved
But nothing was ever done about it

Shall I take back everything I ever said, and live my whole life in silence instead?

It was oversimplified, it was underthought
And nothing was ever done to stop it
Everything was fortified by all the lies we bought
And nothing was ever done to stop it

Shall I take back everything I ever said, and live my whole life in silence instead?
Shall I (shall I take back) take back (all my attacks?) everything (all of my accusations?) I've ever said
and live my (all my mistrust) whole life (we never discussed) in silence (anyone's reservations) instead?

There was a time when a crime was a crime, but now I think I'm losing my mind
and taking it all too hard, taking it all too hard, taking it all too hard . . .

Shall I take back all my attacks, all of my accusations?
All my mistrust, we never discussed anyone's reservations

Shall I (shall I take back) take back (all my attacks?) everything (all of my accusations?) I've ever said
and live my (all my mistrust) whole life (we never discussed) in silence (anyone's reservations) instead?

Maybe you're right . . . maybe you're right . . . maybe you're right, but I don't think so.
Maybe you're right . . . maybe you're right . . . maybe you're right, but I don't think so.

Love that song!

Anyway.  Busy night tonight at work.  Not so much on the floor, so they had me float down to the ER and get a little more experience down there.  A couple of interesting things there . . . kids . . . can't talk about it, of course.  Good outcomes, though.  And interesting scenarios to observe.  I was only down there for an hour or so, then back up to my floor (yeah, I called it "my" floor, lol) where there was enough to keep me busy but not overwhelmingly so.  Actually, it was really nice because the one nurse had all the flu patients, and she did all the cares and stuff that the CNA's usually do because she was already there and everything.  That was freakin' awesome!!  So I helped the other nurse (who is pg and therefore can't be around the flu pts until she gets her H1N1 shot) with a couple of pts who really benefitted from having a little more time and attention. 

It's weird, once I get to work and in the Work Groove, I forget what day it is and that I actually did things in the day other than work.    This morning DS and I went to the library and picked up a couple of Wii games he had on hold, then we went to the grocery store to get some lunch, and then the gas station/car wash.  Then we came home and I did some laundry and . . . finally decided to take the plunge and cut my bangs.  I was nervous to do it myself, but the irrationality of going somewhere and paying someone $10 to do something that would take less than five minutes and could be just as easily done in the privacy of my own home won out.    And instantly, I was glad I did.  See, my hair's at that length now where I can still get away with wearing it down at work, but it does get a little annoying so I like to pull it back.  But for one thing, when I had it all pulled back, some of the hair in the front wouldn't stay back, which was annoying, and for another, I've never liked the way I look with my hair pulled back with no bangs.  I don't think it's a flattering look, especially on someone like me who *ahem* has a pudgier face.  So now, I like the way it looks pulled back, and I don't have those annoying not-quite-long-enough strands that won't stay pulled back falling in my face all the time.  Because I'm also not the kind of girl who can be bothered to plaster her hair back with product and barrettes and bobby pins and all that. 

Anyway.  Tomorrow is church, and homework, and work again.  I'm really, really, REALLY hoping I get put on call.  That would be nice.    We only had five pts tonight, and I think two are possible discharges for tomorrow, so, who knows.  Fingers crossed, fingers crossed, fingers crossed . . .

But if I don't, that won't be the end of the world, either, I guess.  Because I just have tomorrow night and Monday night left to work at the hospital, and then Tuesday at the nursing home, and then I don't have to work until the following Monday again.  Although for scheduling purposes I've started counting my "days off" as those days when I'm not scheduled to be at work OR school, OR going to rehab with my Dad.  And considering the number of assignments I have due before the end of the semester, those aren't true "days off" either because I should be doing homework instead of having fun.

UGH.  Story of my life.  I can't wait for winter break . . . I can't wait to be DONE with school!!!!

Speaking of which, I have a "quick" assignment to go finish up before I go to bed.  Good night!

First of all, I survived OB day on Wednesday!  Woo-hoo!!  It actually worked out really well and wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be, at all.  I got to help with a delivery (and by "help" I mean, 99% of that was watching and 1% was holding one of the mom's legs while she was pushing . . . so yeah, I had a pretty nice viewpoint).  It was weird and cool and gross and beautiful all at the same time.  And I got to see a LOT of what we've been talking about in class put into practice, which is really the whole point of clinicals, so, that was a good thing, too.  Yeah, I obviously can't give details, but it was a good day and a good experience and I'm very glad it's over!! 

I still don't think I want to be an OB nurse when I grow up.  Although I do have a better understanding of what they do, exactly, and I'm not as turned off by it as I was previously.  So I guess what I'm trying to say is that it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be, but it's still not making me think that's where I need to work.  But who knows . . . I'm keeping an open mind about the whole possibility of specializing in the future.  For right now, I just want to get through this semester.  It's driving me crazy that people keep asking me about where I'm going to specialize when I become a real nurse.  !!!!  I am so not thinking that far ahead yet.  Seriously.  OK, that's a partial lie, because I am kind of thinking that I'd like to work in surgery.  And I have actually given some thought to continuing on to get my Bachelors' after this -- especially after finding out that the 2-yr Associates' program is th hardest and most intense part of nursing school, and that the other classes I'd need to take to further my degree can be done online.  That sounds tempting.  But I gotta get the Associate's first. 

ANYWAY . . .

I'm nervous about working tonight.  I haven't worked at the hospital for a few weeks.  But, I don't think that'll be a problem and I anticipate that after about the first half-hour or so of my shift, I'll be fine and comfortable again.  It's not like the nursing home where every resident/patient has a certain routine that they like . . . the way I think of it is, in the nursing home you're on their schedule, but in the hospital they're on YOUR schedule.  (Or "my" schedule.)  KWIM?  I don't mean that in a bad way.  The hospital schedule is a little more flexible and I don't have to worry that I'm going to get my head bitten off if I get Person B ready for bed before Person A. 

Part of me is hoping that I get put on call tonight, so I can get some homework done, but mostly I'm hoping I don't so that I can actually work tonight.  I like working at the hospital, and I want to get in as much face time as I can!!  That's the downfall of working only part-time.  Oh, well.

Not much else going on.  I spent the day with my Dad yesterday, that went well.  I was just really tired.  And my Mom was in a wonderful mood (that's sarcasm) so I didn't stick around very long after she got home from work.  Seriously.  She was just going off on everything, and then she was talking about someone that my Dad's supposed to see at the VA and I didn't understand what she was saying so I was trying, gently, to get some clarification and she about ripped my head off.  So, whatever.  I can take a hint.

Anyway . . . yeah.  I need to go start some laundry and then work on some homework.  And I mean it this time!!  So, have a great day, and I don't know when I'll be back.  TTYL!